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What shirt are you wearing?

What shirt are you wearing?

     What is your t-shirt size, do you even know? What color do you look really good in? I am not talking about clothes. I am talking metaphorically. If the words and labels people throw at us were T-shirts, would you collect them and hang them in your closet? Many of us do. As children, grownups often carelessly throw out hurtful words in a moment of anger and a child will grab it, put it on, and then spend the rest of their lives getting real comfy in that shirt. For example, a parent may say to a child, “You...

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Ping Pong and Life

adjustment change counseling goals

Ping Pong and Life

     Here we are a few days before the New Year. Do you set goals and brainstorm resolutions? A lot of people do, but few keep them. Just check out a gym in January and return in March, according to US News, 12% join in January compared to 8.3% on average other months. Why wait till January to change your life. When people decide to join a gym, they want to change something about themselves. Losing weight, feeling better, meeting someone new, and other changes are possible when you exercise.  Physical, mental and relationship changes are only three of...

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All I want for Christmas...

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All I want for Christmas...

An interesting thought crept into my head early the morning before Thanksgiving. Strangely enough it had nothing to do with turkey and pies. On Thanksgiving Day many families, like mine, stand around the table holding hands and say what they are thankful for. It is the single most day out of the year people in the United States give thanks. Over the next month begins the asking season. Often the very same day, people begin asking, “What do you want?” We even create elaborate detailed lists to make the gift-giving season easier. We write letters to a fictional character in...

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Marriage: Save your fork

marriage

Marriage: Save your fork

             “Save your fork.” I love this! For me this means you have no idea what is coming, but it will be worth staying put, ready to eat fork in hand.  A promise the next course is going to be just as good or better than the previous course. Often this saying is used to let others know that dessert is being served. Something sweet is coming to the table. Now let’s use this saying to parallel it to marriage. The first course, appetizer, is like a tickler of the palate. A primer. The main course...

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Stress- How do you Cope?

stress

Stress- How do you Cope?

            A week has passed since many people living in Orlando had a reality check. There are more elements in life out of our control then in our control. Scary when you think about it. Thankfully, we can bring the big world into a smaller more manageable “world” for ourselves, such as family, career, friends, spirituality, finances, etc. There are many things, often small we can control, but it seems the most catastrophic and traumatizing are those we can’t. When trauma or stress happens it is a good time to check your coping skills. What...

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