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All I want for Christmas...

communication counseling marriage mental health

An interesting thought crept into my head early the morning before Thanksgiving. Strangely enough it had nothing to do with turkey and pies. On Thanksgiving Day many families, like mine, stand around the table holding hands and say what they are thankful for. It is the single most day out of the year people in the United States give thanks. Over the next month begins the asking season. Often the very same day, people begin asking, “What do you want?” We even create elaborate detailed lists to make the gift-giving season easier. We write letters to a fictional character in hopes that our wants get met.  We go from thankfulness- a life blessed, to give me more- a life in need. How about this year, your list is full of ideas to give you more to be thankful for the next Thanksgiving. If you are going to write a letter to the Big Guy, why not ask for something that actually has the potential to change your life? Give yourself or those around you the gift of good mental health.  Maybe this will spark your true wants this holiday season.


Dear Santa,

I have so much to be thankful for, but I want a little more.

  1. The gift of peace in my home- boundaries, conflict resolution, communication
  2. The gift of calm- stress coping skills, mindfulness, being present
  3. The gift of liking myself- self acceptance and love
  4. The gift of liking of others- acceptance not always approval
  5. The gift of no mask- vulnerability and transparency
  6. The gift of happiness- no more depression, anxiety, sadness
  7. The gift of a happy marriage and family- respect and love
  8. etc. etc.

I hope this is not too much to ask but I want to do my part with the peace on earth and goodwill towards men thing. I know it starts with me before I can take it to the whole world.

Hope you have a safe trip. Sorry no cookies and milk this year, we are on a diet and off dairy.

Love, Me


One Christmas season when my boys were little, they asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told them, “Peace in my home which means the two of you stop fighting.” They laughed, and said, “That is not going to happen.” I then asked for noise cancelling headphones.  I read many books while raising my boys trying to learn how to help them become men of integrity and one day, amazing husbands and fathers. I learned conflict is healthy, boundaries are crucial, and self-love are the keys to overall good mental health.

            Call Providence today to set up an appointment giving you the best gift of all.

Author: Elizabeth Havens, MFT Registered Intern-
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